I just want a toaster...

I was buying all my basic housey stuff at Tesco today (it's *that* kind of supermarket/superstore), but feeling overwhelmed... Being in a foreign country means all the brands mean nothing to you, so you don't know which ones do what, and you find there are many brands that do things you've never even heard of.

So you have two options. You can either pick things at random and hope you aren't going to end up with your washing machine spilling a river of frothy soap suds across the floor, or check every single item to make sure it does what you expect it to do.

When you have to read the back of every bottle of washing liquid and read all the dodgy manufacturers claims that mean nothing to you to decide whether you want "unscented" or "hypoallergenic" or "automatic" or "non-biological"... and whether that actually means anything or just another manufacturer's claim (like "full of wholesome goodness")... for every single item in the shopping trolley you find it's quite easy to take several hours just to do a normal shop.

By the end of that you come to a shining wall of toasters and find yourself weighing the benefits of "hi-lift" vs "variable-browning" and whether it's better to have "sneak peek" or "cool wall" technology and you get to the stage where you just want to scream "I want something that takes bread and spits out toast, that's *all* I want!"... :P

...and since when did toasters all become so *huge*. I'm missing the toaster I had in Sydney even despite having a dodgy Singapore plug that required a plug-adapter to use. It took four slices of toast and fit into nearly the same space as my new two-slice toaster that's tall and fat and looks like some kind of shiny metal alien pod. :P

and in case you ask "well why didn't I choose one that doesn't look like that - they all do, of course. Apart from the ones that are even *bigger* and look like some kind of industrial machine that will take your bread and throw it clear across the factory floor to the industrial jam-spreader...

...in the end, of course, I went with the one that had all of the above. Because I can't be sure I won't suddenly need "cool wall" technology (whatever that is)... I can always google it when I get home.